why i loved being a kid

`Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.

"Beware the Jabberwock, my son!
The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun
The frumious Bandersnatch!"

i loved being a kid..... i loved not having a care in the world.....
i loved sleeping like a baby....
i loved being lost in my own world of ghosts, goblins, elves and the ent people....
i loved being able to see things in my own weird, special, strange, inexplicable way.
The trees trusted me with their ancient secrets.... clouds reached out their spindly fingers to beckon me to the other side.... the smell of rain, and running out in into puddles as soon as they formed..... i miss being a kid.

i always wonder if this is whats wrong with us. us, humanity, i.e.
i wonder why people want to grow up... i wonder if we realize how much we change when we grow up. and always for the worse.

i was much nicer as a kid. i actually washed my hands before i stuck them into my food. or anyone else's. while they were still eating it.

i was much kinder as a kid. i did laugh at people. but only when they slipped down and fell. especially when they slipped on the mess i'd made on the floor. by squishing toothpaste and ketchup...just to see if it looked good. or tasted good.

i was much smarter when i was a kid. telling right from wrong was easier. probably cos there were no gray areas. i didn't rationalize. i knew it was wrong. i didn't justify. i said i was sorry. i didn't avoid. i said i didn't know. i didn't make excuses. i told stories.

and oh, i could tell stories. i dint tell them like tony blair does. i dint lie, like george w does. i knew they were stories. everyone knew they were stories. but thats what they loved. that they were honest tales. very tall. very colourful. very fantastic. full of the stuff that exists only in your head. but they were truly, honestly, made up. i loved telling stories. i loved the expressions of incredulity and fright and curiosity on a listening face. it gave me a buzz. we lived in a world where we believed. we questioned. but only to know more. we imagined. in a very lennon way.

i wish i could go back. not a care in the world ( other than homework. and whether natasha would let me copy it from her again! ). i made friends easily. and they stayed for life. the gang from school are still the closest friends i have. they'll always be. of course, i still finish the ice cream lolly before they come, so i dont have to share it with them. but then, the point is, that they didn't mind eating what was left of my half-eaten, licked-all-over-lolly.

i just dont seem to make the effort anymore with people i meet. you just know its going to be short lived. they might move, i might move, they might get in a new relationship, i might get a new dog, they might have personal issues, i might have pups. theres always things that come up. i understand that. and accept it. i just feel sad that i dont let myself get close to people anymore.

i was a lot less inhibited as a kid ( now i need a whole pitcher of beer ). i really did run out and splash in puddles when it rained. completely soaking wet. and completely, idiotically happy. the last time i did that was a couple of years ago. abrupt downpour in april, when the rain is warm, the weather stormy, the smell nostalgic and the puddles dirty brown. victor, bruce and me. three "grown lads" splashing around in the middle of the street, and in the middle of the day ( i should file that away as one of those "happy places" to go to when i finally have my nervous breakdown ). but what i also remember, is the number of people that made enquiries of my mum later. asking if i really was a doctor. if i was ...uh... maybe... "slow"?

i cling to the child in me. perhaps its strange. perhaps morbid. but it keeps me from getting too cynical and disappointed. disappointed with the world in general, and what we've done to it. i do my bit too. i use less electricity. by not taking showers too often. or eating out of the cereal box ( saves water - no dishes to do ). i try not drive too much ( but there's a limit to how often i can bunk work ). less telly. more comics. see? comics will save the world, i tell you.



He took his vorpal sword in hand:
Long time the manxome foe he sought --
So rested he by the Tumtum tree,
And stood awhile in thought.

And, as in uffish thought he stood,
The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as it came!